Grief is often associated with the death of a loved one, but as Camille Vargas of Loss Support Services explains, the landscape of loss is far broader. In this interview, Camille shares insights from her work with clients navigating identity loss, the signs that indicate a need for structured support, and the practical realities of remote grief counseling.
Question 1: What are the most common types of loss people seek support for, beyond the loss of a loved one?
Camille observes that many clients are grieving something less visible than a death: the loss of their identity. "Many clients tie their sense of purpose to a role, such as being a caregiver, spouse, or employee. When that role changes or ends, they can be left asking, 'Who am I now?' and struggling to find meaning and purpose again." This kind of loss often goes unrecognized, yet it can be just as disorienting. As PsychCentral notes, grief can stem from losing a home, a job, or the end of a relationship—not just the death of a person.
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Question 2: How do you help someone who is struggling to tell the difference between normal grief and something that may need more structured support?
Camille uses a structured approach during the initial meeting. "I assess a person's social support system, coping skills, emotional state, reactions to loss, and how they have navigated previous losses or life challenges. I often use the BRAT Assessment framework to guide this process." If someone has limited support or relies on unhealthy coping mechanisms, she provides grief education and uses assessment tools to help them recognize signs of complicated grief. This aligns with guidance from HelpGuide, which emphasizes acknowledging pain and understanding that grief can trigger many unexpected emotions.
Question 3: What does a remote counseling session look like for someone new to online grief support?
For those new to online support, Camille prioritizes creating a safe, judgment-free space. "The first session is focused on building rapport through an open and approachable conversation. During the initial assessment, we explore their life experiences, losses, support system, and coping strategies." She emphasizes that clients should feel comfortable sharing their story and also get to know her, building trust as they begin the healing process together. This person-centered approach is a cornerstone of effective grief counseling, as highlighted by PositivePsychology.com, which stresses active listening and empathy.
Question 4: How does spiritual exploration fit into the healing process for clients who are open to it?
Spirituality can be a meaningful part of healing for some clients. Camille explains, "If a client shares experiences such as meaningful dreams, signs, or symbolism that have emerged during their grief journey, we may explore what those experiences mean to them." For those open to faith, spirituality can provide comfort, hope, and connection. She may share parts of her own journey, including how her faith helped her navigate grief, but always keeps the focus on the client's beliefs and needs. This resonates with research on coping skills, where spirituality is listed as one of the six coping skills when grieving.
Question 5: What is one thing you wish more people understood about grief that is rarely talked about?
Camille wishes more people understood that it's okay to show emotion. "We live in a fast-paced world where many people feel pressure to appear strong or act like everything is fine. But if we all hid our emotions, it would be harder to recognize when someone needs compassion, patience, or simply a person to sit with them during a difficult time." She challenges the cultural notion that showing emotion is weakness, stating, "Expressing our emotions is an important part of healing. It allows us to process our experiences, connect with others, and talk openly about our pain rather than carrying it alone." This perspective is echoed by grief expert David Kessler, who teaches that emotions aren't 'wrong' and that healing begins when we face them (Mel Robbins Podcast).
For those seeking support, Loss Support Services offers compassionate, remote counseling that meets clients where they are—whether grieving a death, a role, or an identity.